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Author Topic: What's on your mind? Chat Thread  (Read 15581 times)

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patrick jane

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Re: What's on your mind? Chat Thread
« Reply #338 on: May 13, 2022, 02:55:49 am »
It took me awhile to recognize, admit and accept that I have severe PTSD. I've already talked about the reasons. So I'm unable to sleep many nights due to nightmares which I can't control. During the day I have flashbacks and images of horrific experiences. There are ways that I try to deal with that, but again it's something I can't control as far as stopping it from happening. Sometimes there are triggers that bring things to mind and/or cause a reaction. It could be something someone says to me, something I hear, something I see happening. Even aspects of religious beliefs can be triggering because of church abuse. I'm being honest and open about this. But many of the things I post reflect the things that have importance to me that I try to make others aware of that doesn't seem to be talked about by the Christian community but it should be because it is affecting so many people including Christians and especially children. I'm very concerned about the well being of children and the way they are being indoctrinated and even mind controlled which I know how that works all too well. And it even happens in some Christians churches by evil people who have infiltrated those churches.

Anyway, my family doctor knows that I have PTSD. Therapy has never helped me because most therapists have no knowledge about what I'm saying and basically dismiss it. Even Christian ministers I've talked to dismiss it as if what I'm saying can't or isn't happening. But it has/is happening on a major scale. Now more than ever. I hope one day that Christians will take it seriously or at least be willing to talk about it. I speak out on many platforms. There are some people who are aware enough to know the truth about these things. So that is encouraging to me and gives me hope that the more people who know about it and know it's true will make a difference in the lives of people and children who may not have the courage to speak out but will get some feeling of comfort and understanding if they see and hear other people taking it seriously. This has been covered up and kept quiet for way too long.
When I was younger, I believed that I was safe in a Christian church but as it turned out, that was where I experienced the worst kind of evil. Not that it only happened in Christian churches.

The things that I'm seeing happening now out in the open and being accepted and pushed so hard, were once done in secret in secret places out of public view. The violence, the lawlessness, the lack of love, mercy and compassion, the blurring of lines, God's order of things being turned upside down, the abortions especially live ones, no boundaries, a free for all, hatred, division, chaos, confusion, destruction, evil, hatred of God....etc. And all these things I'm seeing is extremely triggering to me.
I have PTSD from childhood when I heard the cussing, screaming and yelling and the sounds of my dad beating my mom. I was helpless and scared and loud talking, yelling and cussing make me cringe and shut down or I go the other way and start yelling back.

Thankfully, I was never abused sexually but then I was abused by kids in the neighborhood. I fought back and won my fights earning a reputation as being tough that lasted until high school. I never fought in high school, just didn't have to but I started skipping school a lot.

I was never involved too deeply in a church etc. and I was not sexually active until age 24 because I was too busy getting high.
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