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Author Topic: The Story  (Read 1902 times)

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patrick jane

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Re: The Story
« Reply #13 on: March 06, 2021, 05:20:54 am »
The opening scene and the dialogue can easily be created in short order, so let's think of the overall plot/story. I love the input from Mr E about the insider at NASA who goes rogue. What did he see or discover that causes him to reach out?
Hearing, believing and trusting the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross; His death, burial and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins and REPENTING, seals us with that Holy Spirit of Promise - EPHESIANS 1:10-14 KJV - The Lord is not slack concerning His promise. 2 Peter 3:9 KJV - 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 KJV - Ephesians 1:10-14 KJV - Romans 10:9-10 KJV - Romans 10:13 - Romans 10:17 - Ephesians 1:7 KJV - Colossians 1:14 KJV -


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Mr E

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Re: The Story
« Reply #14 on: March 08, 2021, 08:08:41 pm »
I would create the main character to be female and her boyfriend the skeptic.  She sees the wikileaks release of faked moon landing video and digs deeper to discover that they are also faking Mars rover footage.

Key scene....  I was confronted with irrefutable evidence that SCREAMED, not suggested-- 'It's all bullshit.  All of it."
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Bladerunner

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Re: The Story
« Reply #15 on: March 08, 2021, 08:31:40 pm »
I would create the main character to be female and her boyfriend the skeptic.  She sees the wikileaks release of faked moon landing video and digs deeper to discover that they are also faking Mars rover footage.

Key scene....  I was confronted with irrefutable evidence that SCREAMED, not suggested-- 'It's all bullshit.  All of it."

It will be interesting where this goes.

Blade
1 Cor 15:3-4.."For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures:"

Acts 17:11.."These were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so."
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Chaplain Mark Schmidt

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Re: The Story
« Reply #16 on: March 08, 2021, 08:34:38 pm »
While I am different I like to do the character's backstories   This helps me keep the characters on point so the story line stays focused.    It also helps if there is a sequel I know where I started and where they are at.
Say each prayer as if it is your very last conversation with God and live each day as your last day to glorify God by your actions and words.Ē

My rule of spiritual life.  6/22/2021
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Mr E

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Re: The Story
« Reply #17 on: March 08, 2021, 08:54:41 pm »
Chappy-- I do like that Orwell story too.  I read it in high school (as required reading at that time) in 1981 and was astonished to learn it had been written in 1949.  Even then I knew this was no ordinary story, but a vision of things to come.

Blessings upon you from our Father on high.
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patrick jane

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Re: The Story
« Reply #18 on: March 09, 2021, 04:09:18 pm »
It's been quite a long time since I attempted an outline as I did them in my head before starting to write in college. I didn't try very hard and still got A's and the professor read my papers out loud several times. I think I've lost some skills and some creativeness and imagination but those are minor setbacks, haha.




The Story Outline

1. Introduce dialogue and characters (multiple scenes)
  a. Give some background on each character through conversation and visual aids
  b. Maintain intellectual dialogue with humor and sarcasm
  c. Immediately begin raising questions about NASA, earth and the Universe
  d. Introduce and maintain a Christian belief by some characters
  e. Introduce and maintain Anti Christian beliefs and dogma
  f. The two main characters will be a younger couple, perhaps not married but boyfriend/girlfriend - (or two gays?)


2. Start Focusing on NASA
  a. Rocket Launches
  b. Wikileaks
  c. Fake footage of landings, space and the landscape of Mars
  d. Plant seeds of flat earth in several previous scenes & conversations
  e. Continually raise doubt about what real scientific research is, what science can prove and repeat and the difference between science and pseudoscience 
  f.




Anyone feel free to add or edit the outline, please explain briefly with reasoning shown.
Hearing, believing and trusting the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross; His death, burial and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins and REPENTING, seals us with that Holy Spirit of Promise - EPHESIANS 1:10-14 KJV - The Lord is not slack concerning His promise. 2 Peter 3:9 KJV - 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 KJV - Ephesians 1:10-14 KJV - Romans 10:9-10 KJV - Romans 10:13 - Romans 10:17 - Ephesians 1:7 KJV - Colossians 1:14 KJV -


Copyright Disclaimer: All audio and music belongs to the owner/creator. This is a non-profit. Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.

Mr E

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Re: The Story
« Reply #19 on: March 10, 2021, 05:55:35 am »
I'll offer an idea to give your story more depth.  You can employ it in many ways, but you need to develop an undercurrent-- or stories within stories to put it another way. 

For example- if your main character is the woman who hears something that makes her question her beliefs, you need also to provide a reason that she would be willing to do so, because there are many--- even most people who would hear something like that and simply refuse to let their beliefs be challenged or assaulted by truth.  Instead they would enter right into the conspiracy and assist with the cover up to silence the truth rather than be confronted by it.  It might bother them, but they'd never allow it to become exposed-- this is the very nature of how and why conspiracy secrets become what they are.  So there must be a spark of honor within her, something from her childhood, or upbringing or somewhere that won't let her ignore what she hears and compels her to act when so many others would not.  Give her a strength uncommon.

You can make her husband character a cop, or a judge or lawyer someone who deals only with facts and evidence to develop their character and this lends credibility to why they are skeptical of the unbelievable things she has told them she heard....  but then find the undercurrent in this character too.  Maybe he deals only in facts and evidence, law and order- yet he knows within himself that he has been bought before.... political favor, bribes of a sort-- look the other way on occasion.  He knows that things happen, secrets are sometimes kept and not all things are as they appear.  Give him a weakness that is common to all.
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patrick jane

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Re: The Story
« Reply #20 on: March 10, 2021, 10:15:41 am »
I'll offer an idea to give your story more depth.  You can employ it in many ways, but you need to develop an undercurrent-- or stories within stories to put it another way. 

For example- if your main character is the woman who hears something that makes her question her beliefs, you need also to provide a reason that she would be willing to do so, because there are many--- even most people who would hear something like that and simply refuse to let their beliefs be challenged or assaulted by truth.  Instead they would enter right into the conspiracy and assist with the cover up to silence the truth rather than be confronted by it.  It might bother them, but they'd never allow it to become exposed-- this is the very nature of how and why conspiracy secrets become what they are.  So there must be a spark of honor within her, something from her childhood, or upbringing or somewhere that won't let her ignore what she hears and compels her to act when so many others would not.  Give her a strength uncommon.

You can make her husband character a cop, or a judge or lawyer someone who deals only with facts and evidence to develop their character and this lends credibility to why they are skeptical of the unbelievable things she has told them she heard....  but then find the undercurrent in this character too.  Maybe he deals only in facts and evidence, law and order- yet he knows within himself that he has been bought before.... political favor, bribes of a sort-- look the other way on occasion.  He knows that things happen, secrets are sometimes kept and not all things are as they appear.  Give him a weakness that is common to all.
Yes, ok but not too corrupt or they will be crazy conspiracy losers.  8) ;D
Hearing, believing and trusting the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross; His death, burial and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins and REPENTING, seals us with that Holy Spirit of Promise - EPHESIANS 1:10-14 KJV - The Lord is not slack concerning His promise. 2 Peter 3:9 KJV - 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 KJV - Ephesians 1:10-14 KJV - Romans 10:9-10 KJV - Romans 10:13 - Romans 10:17 - Ephesians 1:7 KJV - Colossians 1:14 KJV -


Copyright Disclaimer: All audio and music belongs to the owner/creator. This is a non-profit. Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.

Mr E

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Re: The Story
« Reply #21 on: March 10, 2021, 10:31:09 am »
Her job requires her to do her job, not ask questions.  It's like a mantra at NASA. Ask too many questions-even innocent ones, and you no longer have a job.  You get the talk when you get the job and if you ever get the talk again, you no longer have the job.

But she has these childhood memories.  Good memories.  So many memories of time spent with her Dad growing up on the Cape in Florida, having both the sheen and the shadow of NASA's presence in the community and it's all she ever wanted to do as a little girl... to grow up and work for NASA like Dad.  Those memories propelled her through high school and college, then graduate school and when she finally interviewed and was hired-- and got the talk, there was no question that she would have no questions.  She was just so glad to be there.  To have this opportunity.

But then there was another memory.  As a six year old she got to meet real astronauts.  Her Dad introduced her to all seven, but she was in love with one in particular- a teacher, named Christa McAuliffe.  And she watched in horror when later she stood at a distance with her father for the launch. You just don't forget something like that.  It's etched inside along with the words her Dad said when she buried her face into him and sobbed.  "They'll be okay" he said, "You don't have to cry- they are all fine."  But they weren't fine.  They were all dead.  Blown to smithereens as the saying goes... She remembers the jokes that came later concerning NASA- which stands for "Need Another Seven Astronauts."  Oh-- that's a funny one... not.

And that's not the only strange thing her father said to her with respect to his work at NASA.



Fun story PJ!  I can't wait to see where it goes!

patrick jane

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Re: The Story
« Reply #22 on: March 10, 2021, 10:31:51 am »
Maybe the leading lady lost a child or sibling to medical malpractice or an experimental drug. I know what you mean about the husband, little compromises of ethics and integrity.
Hearing, believing and trusting the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross; His death, burial and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins and REPENTING, seals us with that Holy Spirit of Promise - EPHESIANS 1:10-14 KJV - The Lord is not slack concerning His promise. 2 Peter 3:9 KJV - 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 KJV - Ephesians 1:10-14 KJV - Romans 10:9-10 KJV - Romans 10:13 - Romans 10:17 - Ephesians 1:7 KJV - Colossians 1:14 KJV -


Copyright Disclaimer: All audio and music belongs to the owner/creator. This is a non-profit. Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.

patrick jane

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Re: The Story
« Reply #23 on: March 10, 2021, 10:33:46 am »
Her job requires her to do her job, not ask questions.  It's like a mantra at NASA. Ask too many questions-even innocent ones, and you no longer have a job.  You get the talk when you get the job and if you ever get the talk again, you no longer have the job.

But she has these childhood memories.  Good memories.  So many memories of time spent with her Dad growing up on the Cape in Florida, having both the sheen and the shadow of NASA's presence in the community and it's all she ever wanted to do as a little girl... to grow up and work for NASA like Dad.  Those memories propelled her through high school and college, then graduate school and when she finally interviewed and was hired-- and got the talk, there was no question that she would have no questions.  She was just so glad to be there.  To have this opportunity.

But then there was another memory.  As a six year old she got to meet real astronauts.  Her Dad introduced her to all seven, but she was in love with one in particular- a teacher, named Christa McAuliffe.  And she watched in horror when later she stood at a distance with her father for the launch. You just don't forget something like that.  It's etched inside along with the words her Dad said when she buried her face into him and sobbed.  "They'll be okay" he said, "You don't have to cry- they are all fine."  But they weren't fine.  They were all dead.  Blown to smithereens as the saying goes... She remembers the jokes that came later concerning NASA- which stands for "Need Another Seven Astronauts."  Oh-- that's a funny one... not.

And that's not the only strange thing her father said to her with respect to his work at NASA.



Fun story PJ!  I can't wait to see where it goes!
Brother, I was going to say she remember her twin brothers blowing up in the Challenger mishap. Very cool man, we are thinking of some of the same things.
Hearing, believing and trusting the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross; His death, burial and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins and REPENTING, seals us with that Holy Spirit of Promise - EPHESIANS 1:10-14 KJV - The Lord is not slack concerning His promise. 2 Peter 3:9 KJV - 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 KJV - Ephesians 1:10-14 KJV - Romans 10:9-10 KJV - Romans 10:13 - Romans 10:17 - Ephesians 1:7 KJV - Colossians 1:14 KJV -


Copyright Disclaimer: All audio and music belongs to the owner/creator. This is a non-profit. Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.

patrick jane

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Re: The Story
« Reply #24 on: March 10, 2021, 10:38:16 am »
And maybe she starts looking into the source for these 24 hour satellite live streams supposedly showing clear and undeniable curvature. She just wants to know more and verify these images. That might be too boring though.
Hearing, believing and trusting the finished work of Jesus Christ on the cross; His death, burial and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins and REPENTING, seals us with that Holy Spirit of Promise - EPHESIANS 1:10-14 KJV - The Lord is not slack concerning His promise. 2 Peter 3:9 KJV - 1 Corinthians 15:1-4 KJV - Ephesians 1:10-14 KJV - Romans 10:9-10 KJV - Romans 10:13 - Romans 10:17 - Ephesians 1:7 KJV - Colossians 1:14 KJV -


Copyright Disclaimer: All audio and music belongs to the owner/creator. This is a non-profit. Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing.

Mr E

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Re: The Story
« Reply #25 on: March 10, 2021, 10:59:42 am »
I'm just playing.... there are a hundred avenues to explore various theories that exist that could be incorporated into your story line.  I was pursuing the idea that your character overhears something about a living, breathing Challenger astronaut.... what?

What if I were to tell you that most, if not all, of Challengerís 7 crew members are still alive and thriving in their new professions, contrary to what weíve been told?


Itís one thing that one of the Challengerís crew members resembles someone alive today. For that, we can chalk it up to a coincidence.

It's another thing entirely that SIX members of the Challenger crew have doppelgangers who are alive, in some cases with exactly the same names (Richard Scobee, Michael J. Smith, Judith Resnick, Sharon McAuliffe). What are the chances of that?
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